A Diabolically Happy Return

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 As Logged By:

Agent Chase 

 

Mommy left for some meeting

The days were anything but fleeting.

Now, she's coming back today

And bringing Gobbles some special hay!

 

In the door Mommy walks

And all she does is talks.

Look at this baby's happy dance

And Gobbles' adorable prance. 

 

 What is a diabolical mastermind to do?
 
For three days I've had leftovers from the same casserole.  Something healthy, something without soul.  No taste, just waste.  Such a blah existence for a baby.
 
I can't blame Daddy, he's doing his best.
 
Especially since he's going without his rest.
 
Yes, yes, yes.  This little one has kept Daddy up every single night.  What fun!  
 
Now, he's dragging his feet.  He can barely get the food in the microwave, let alone prepare a house that I've destroyed before Mommy gets home.
 
Hehe!
 
But!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Today's the day!  Mommy's coming home and I'm going to make sure this place looks like a war zone.
 
I play quietly with my blocks, all the while peeking over at Daddy sitting on the couch.  
 
One head nod, then another.  Soon enough he's snoring and this is my chance.  I crawl across the floor.  What's in the toy box?
 
WHOOSH!
 
SWOOSH!
 
But, I dare not crash.  No, no.  That would wake Daddy up.
 
On to the kitchen where I knock the garbage pail over and everything spills on the floor.
 
A few more touches here and there.  The whole box of tissues is now splayed and frayed.  What else can I do?
 
OHHHH!
 
How about a dirty diaper to boot?
 
PPPHHHHRRRRRFFFFFTTTTHHHHHPPPPPTTTTTT!!!!
 
"I'm ho...."
 
Mommy steps one foot in the door.  Her eyes slightly widen and, then, she hears Daddy's snore.
 
"WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS PLACE!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"
 
"Huh?"  Daddy rolls over and falls to the floor.  He takes one look around and... "AAHHHHHHH!!!!  I swear it didn't look like this five minutes ago."
 
Mommy twitches, Mommy fumes.  She looks ready to yell.  That's when she remembers that this baby is a diabolical one.
 
A single eye lift and a little growl.
 
That's all my antics got out of that diabolical Mommy.
 
"Anyway, I'm home," she tries so hard to forget the mess that is everywhere.  "And I made sure to pick up something special for our little turkey."
 
He didn't need his name called.  Gobbles knows what's going on.
 
He sprints, he veers, he crashes, and he...  well, he tries to fly as he awkwardly flaps and hops about.
 
Gobbles gives some adorable gobble calls and jumps straight into the box of the fluffy green stuff.
 
"And, I decided to pick up some takeout to celebrate my coming home."
 
TAKEOUT!!!?!?!?!?
 
Hooray!
 
No more bland casserole, just yummy flavor.
 
It's enough to make this baby get up and dance.
 
I wiggle, I waggle.  I throw my hands in the air and shake them.
 
"And, then the road construction..............................blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.........."
 
Mommy!  Mommy!  Stop your talking!  Look at your little Chase.  Watch me do a happy dance.
 
Mommy doesn't notice, but Gobbles sure does.
 
He hops on over and prances alongside my dance.  But wait, he's getting too close,  He's going to...
 
Uh oh!
 
Down I fall with only one thing to soften that landing. 
 
KERSPLAAT!
 
Daddy freezes and Mommy goes silent.
 
They slowly twist in my direction.
 
"Was Chase's diaper already full?"
 
"Umm... Umm..."  Is all that Daddy can manage.
 
Yes, Mommy.  It was beyond full.  Now you have an exploded diapy and a very stinky baby to clean.  
 
Welcome home!
 
 
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