A Diabolically Injured Mommy

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As Logged By:

Agent West

 

Mommy may have hurt her back

Trying to lift my diaper sack.

Now she's stuck on the couch

With the frown of a grouch.

 

Is it age?  Is it genetic?

The thoughts turn Mommy quite hectic.

"I'm not old," Mommy shouts.

Uh oh, here come the pouts. 

 

"AAAAAHHHHHHH," Mommy wails from the other side of the house and I lift my head to look about.
 
How can she already be screaming?
 
I have yet to throw this stink bomb at her.
 
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"  She cries again and this time I have to find out why.
 
Carefully hiding the stink bomb for later (hey, I'm a diabolical dude.  I'm still going to get Mommy), I crawl my way down the hall.  Around the corner I carefully roam only to find Mommy on the couch with dozens of pillows propped behind her back.
 
"I'M NOT OLD!"  She screams at Daddy, who is looking like he's been shocked with a few bolts of lightning.
 
"Of course not," Daddy tries to say with his voice shaking and quivering in every way.  "Why would you ever think that you're old?"
 
"OH, be quiet!  I know you're secretly laughing at me."
 
Daddy's ready to deny it.  However, with a little squint and I can see the corners of his mouth tilting up just a bit.
 
HEHE, Daddy's secretly laughing.
 
"All you did was slip.  It has nothing to do with actually lifting the diaper bag," he tries to comfort.
 
"I know I slipped!  I slipped trying to lift that thing that clearly has more than just diapers in it!  What did you put in there?  A bowling ball?"
 
"Um, no."  Daddy looks around confused.
 
"I'M NOT OLD!"
 
"No one's saying you are."
 
Mommy jerks her head over to Daddy and, I swear, she's foaming at the mouth.  "You're thinking it.  I know you are."
 
Daddy takes a few careful steps backward.  Smart move, Daddy.  Smart move.
 
I'm sure that Mommy will never notice you.
 
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!?!?"
 
Never mind.
 
"I knew it!"  Mommy pouts with extra large tears welling out the sides of her eyes. 
 
Okay, okay.  The time has come for this diabolical dude to bring out his adorable side.  Maybe I'll even give Mommy a spit bubble or two.
 
I slowly crawl over, all the while remembering that Mommy is angry.  I've got to play this carefully or I'll be backing away like Daddy.
 
"I can't lift you, West.  I'm sorry, but..."  
 
Mommy stops when she sees me climbing up onto the couch all by myself.  She forgets about her back and watches in awe.  All I'm simply doing is an adorable crawl.
 
I amble on over and lean my head on her lap.
 
Mommy smiles and pats my back.
 
Daddy relaxes enough to stop backing up and he even drops his shoulders a bit.
 
"Thank you, West.  I needed this cuddle," Mommy sighs.
 
PPPHHHHFFFFFRRRRTTTTTHHHHPPPPPTTTT!
 
Oopsies, I guess there was a stinky something I could no longer hide. 
 
 
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