Diabolical Teething

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 As Logged By:

Agent Chase

 

Oh, this ache along my gum

Has me gnawing till it's numb.

A pair of keys and a plastic cup

Aren't able to hold up.

 

Oh, this pain is growing worse.

I'm even gnawing on Mommy's purse!

How will I ever sleep at night?

Wait, what's this in my bite? 

 

Ech!  Ahh!  Ooh!
 
Oh, my gums!  They hurt, they hurt.  This pain is a diabolical curse.
 
What monstrosity has happened to me to make my gums ache so heavily?  I must chew on something soon, I must ease this pain as only chewing can do.
 
I crawl, I crawl.  All along the ground.  I crawl around until something for me to chew can be found.  
 
A banana?  Too soft.  That and this one is a sneaky surprise I've set for Mommy to find in a month or so.  It already has turned oozy and a little gooey.  
 
I crawl, I crawl.  What is there to help my aching gums?
 
A teddy bear might work, but one bite and I find that this teddy's arm is just too soft.  I need something I can really gnaw on.  
 
There!
 
Over by Mommy's top-heavy bay, what do I see but my old pair of keys.  I crawl on over, I rush as fast as a diabolical baby can.  
 
Num, num.  I grip and bite, finally some relief.  Num, num.  I gnaw and gnaw, the pain is numbing.  It is finally going, going...
 
"There they are!"  Mommy cries and rushes to my side.  "I've been looking everywhere for those keys.  They are do for a wash, Sweetie."
 
What?  NO!  Don't take my plastic keys.  I need to keep chewing, I need this relief.
 
"While I'm at it, I'll clean this plastic cup of yours too."
 
Drat!
 
Crazy Mommy took the only item left.  The one other thing I could chew on for some pain relief.  Stinky Mommy, taking my toys.  Do they really need to be cleaned?
 
Ach!  Aah!  Ooh!  OUCH!
 
I dare say, this diabolical pain is growing worse.
 
I'm all set to cry.  I squish my face and crinkle my nose.  I take a deep inhale...
 
Then I spot Mommy's purse.
 
Those leather straps just may do the trick.  Their firm and could be exactly what my gums need.
 
I'm up for the challenge.  I'll give them a gnaw.  Why not?  Some gum relief and a diabolical act all rolled into one.
 
I scootle and scoot.  I crawl on over.
 
Num, num.  Ech, leather does not taste good at all.  Num, num.  But, if it's all I can chew on, I'll chew for any kind of relief.
 
Num, num.  NUM, NUM!
 
"Chase!  What are you doing?"  Mommy races over.  "Ugh, you've covered my purse with your drool."
 
Wait until you see the frayed edges on those straps, too!
 
"No, you can't keep chewing on my purse."
 
Mommy tries to yank the strap away, but I'm too busy gnawing and chewing.  
 
"Chase, let go."
 
When I don't yield, Mommy goes for her tried and true, loop the finger around the gums trick to get her purse strap free.  
 
Num, num.  BITE! 
 
Uh-oh!
 
"Ouch!"
 
Unfortunately for her loop the finger around the gums trick, I was still chewing and I might have given her finger a little nip.
 
"Ouch..."  Mommy looks at her finger.  She tilts her head and stares at me.  "Chase, what is that in your mouth?"
 
Huh?  Something is in my mouth.
 
"Open up and let me see."  Mommy tilts my head and peers inside.  "AAAAAHHHHHH!  You've gotten your first tooth!  This is amazing!!!"
 
Through the house Mommy sprints.  Screaming and shrieking with hysterical delight.  Meanwhile, I reach over and take hold of a purse strap.
 
Num, num.
 
 
Upcoming log:
 
Previous log:  A Diabolical Bunny Hop 

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