It takes a diabolical Mommy to make a diabolical baby

 As Logged By:


Agent Chase


Looking like Patrick Stewart

Might have started my mission

And made this sweet baby convert,

But Mommy has given me a suspicion.


I might be a captain

That's leading the next generation

While Mommy's original series fashion

Has a whole different destination.


Do I dare say it?  Is this even possible?  How could something so huge go unnoticed?  How did I not know?

Is Mommy diabolical, too?!

"Are you sure?"  Mommy asked of Daddy last week, her lips pinched and eyebrows raised.  A conniving glint in her eye caught my attention and I started to become suspicious.

Daddy instantly nodded.  "Yes, I'm sure."

"You wouldn't rather I be doing something else?"

"What else could possibly be so important that you can't help me with this?"  Daddy threw his arms into the air, to which Mommy shrugged.  Though I noticed something odd in her otherwise nonchalance.

"Okay.  I'll do it.  If that's what you really want."  And Mommy got right to work helping Daddy without saying another word.  Not one complaint, but there was one hint of a smirk that caught my attention.  What game was Mommy playing?

The next day, though, Daddy remembered something.  Something very important indeed...

"Hey, weren't we going to make jerky today?"  He asked with his head perked high.

"We were, but not anymore."

"What!?"  Daddy wailed, about to fall over to the floor.  "Why not?!  We have to make jerky.  No one makes jerky as good as you!"

Mommy's lips twitched with a smirk.  "You specifically said yesterday that nothing else was more important.  That I had to put all of my projects on hold to help you.  That included getting everything ready and making the marinade and slicing the meat.  Now, it's too late."  Mommy explained, then added with a shrug, "I guess we'll have to wait and try again next year."

"NO!!!!!!!!"  Daddy melted to the floor.  Not literally.  He's not a wicked witch, you know.  "I can't go an entire year without your jerky."  Daddy ran through the house and out the door.  He ran circles in the yard and around the car.  "I'll do anything.  ANYTHING!  I'm sorry I made you cover for me.  I'll never do it again.  Just please tell me it's not too late for jerky."

Well..."  Mommy thought for a second.  

"I'll do it!  Whatever it is, I'll do it!"

Mommy glanced at me.  A twinkle in her eye encouraging my suspicion.  Had this been Mommy's plan all along?  Was she pulling Daddy's strings for fun?

"I guess if you did all of my chores for today and tomorrow, then I might have enough time to make jerky.  But you'll have to do everything and get takeout for dinner tonight."

"Done!  I'll do it!"

"Even cleaning out the diaper station?"

"I'll scrub it until it shines."  And off Daddy zoomed.  Dusting and mopping, scrubbing and sweeping.  Never once noticing the sneaky smirk spreading on Mommy's lips.

She glanced down at me with an eyebrow raised in triumph.  "Remember, Chase.  Rule number one:  when it comes to handling a husband, always stack the deck."

Well played, Mommy.  Well played.

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