Put my diaper on. I dare you!

-

As Logged By:

Agent West

 

I don't have a poopy waiting,

Ready to explode once my diaper's on.

Or maybe I'm lying and baiting

To let you think that you've won.

 

Will it be green

Or possibly brown?

It depends on what I've been eating

And how it went down.

 

"Go poopy, West.  I know you have to."

Yes, I do!  In fact, I've been waiting and holding my poopy in.  But sitting on the potty when I have to go poopy makes it difficult to hold it in much longer.  It'll all be worth it, though.

I promise.  Hahaha!

Mommy rubs her face.  She sighs a heavy sigh and you're about to know why.  This baby has been rebelling in a most diabolical way.

"I gave you stewed prunes with your squash.  I know that you have to be ready to explode."

YES I AM!

I grit my toothless gums and try to hold it in a little longer.

Mommy sighs again.  "Okay, fine."

Off of the potty she lifts me to put a diaper back on.  Finally!  This mega poopy of mine was about to win and come on out to make Mommy happy.

Stop taking the time to wipe my bumbum, Mommy!  Just put that diaper on once and for all.

Slowly, so desperately slowly, Mommy snaps one side of the diaper.  Then the other.

"There you go, West.  Diaper is on..."

THBPTTTT!

Ahhhhhhh.......

"No, West!  You didn't?"

Oh, yes I most certainly did.  I filled my diaper to the rim.  I crammed it full.  I let my poopy out to diabolically destroy you.

Mommy unsnaps one side of my diaper and then unsnaps the other.  She takes a peek inside and closes her eyes.

"You're a diabolical one.  You know that?"

Why, thank you!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Diabolical cabbage and beans

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent Chase With   The Puppy The Puppy was right, I admit There was no way to go through with it. Getting everyone to eat cabbage and beans Would have been impossible, by all means. However, we’ve devised another plan. In this temporary truce between dog and man. The Puppy has many friends, you see. Who are willing to eat cabbage and beans, whoo wee!     For weeks I have been saving every scrap of Mommy’s famous cabbage and beans dish, keeping none for myself.  (Not that I want any after the last gas catastrophe.) The toy bin is filled to the rim and it’s starting to smell, but the Puppy reassures me that his friends will still dig in. “Oh, Marge, this was a wonderful idea,” one of Mommy’s friends says as she waves her hand around. “A block party for everyone and their dog. How did you think of it?” “It’s the funniest thing. I saw Chase playing with a magazine that happened to have an article about throwing one of these.”
Read more

Throwing food? I'll give it a try!

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent Rose Please! Don’t mention eating. Not after Agent Chase’s stink infested beating. Cabbage and beans! Were there no other ways? The stink never ended for days and days! My tummy is tumbling and swirling. I fear anything I eat, I’ll end up hurling. But, I do love being a sweetie that’s diabolical. Especially, when I can do something so maniacal!     Agent Chase is going to get a stink bomb in the face! Joining with the Puppy!? Of all the diabolical schemes. She should have known that teaming up with the Puppy would make her diabolical plans explode. “Okay, Rosie. Time for some dinner.” Dinner? No way! My tummy is still too tender for any dinner. “Come on, Sweetie. You need to eat or you’ll get grumpy.” I stare at Daddy with the angriest of angry faces. Grumpy!? Does he have any idea what horrors I’ve been through? Just thinking of it makes my tummy tumble some more. The stink of dog doodie
Read more

Crazy plant lady Mommy

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent West   Why is Mommy sneaking around Like a thief stealing steaks by the pound? What is that in her hand? A seed catalogue named Plant Land? Should I follow this crazy looney Who’s humming an interesting tuney? I’m scared to see what she’s up to. Especially, when she’s talking to Aunt Sue. What in diabolical diaper names is going on? I’m so confused, I’m completely pooped out. Something is wrong with Mommy. Something’s snapped, for sure! She’s gone batty, insane. She’s sipped one too many, eaten her last sanity cookie! Don’t believe me? “Here’s the mail,” Dad calls as he comes in the door and slaps a wad of folded papers onto the dining table. Bills, letters, nothing interesting of the sort. No diabolical packages. No stink bomb greeting cards. “Where is it?!” Mommy frantically races into the room with her phone to her ear and claws through the pile of mail. Her mouth practically foaming! “I can’t find it,
Read more