Will Walk for Peanut Butter

As Logged By:

Agent Rose

 

It's been too long since I've had any,

But standing is no longer enough.

I'll have to be a little more canny

Or this baby will have to get tough!

 

First one step and then another.

How hard can walking be?

I bet I can walk better than Mother

After she's had something that isn't tea.

 

Agent Chase has sent out her orders.  This cutie's diabolical mission of the day is to find a way to break dear old Daddy.  Mommy was easy.  She's so gullible to my cuteness.

But Daddy's been tricky.  There's no denying that.  How shall I break this man?  How shall I put him under my spell?

Look at him sitting at the dining table while he scoops peanut butter straight from the jar.  Oh no, babies can't do that, but it's perfectly fine when parents want to.  So I might have taken too big a bite of peanut butter and choked on the glob as it went down.  Is that really reason to cut me off completely?

Aha!  I have a two birds with one stone idea.

I'm going to get my peanut butter and break Daddy, too!

"Honey, look!"  Mommy exclaims to Daddy with a hearty nudge.  "She's trying to stand again.  Ah!  Did she just try to take a step?"  Mommy sets down her spirited drink, which she assures is not tea, and grabs me.  "Come on, let's see if we can get her to walk from me to you."

"But, my peanut butter," Daddy protests.

"Bring it with you.  Maybe it'll entice her," Mommy declares with another nudge to Daddy.

Yes, Yesss.  Everything is going perfectly to plan.  Too perfectly, perhaps?  NAH!

Mommy and Daddy sit on the floor and face one another.  Holding me while I stand, Mommy says, "Okay.  Go to Daddy, Rose."

Do I go?  

NO!

I swing around and hug Mommy with all of my might.

"But, Rose, Daddy has peanut butter.  Look."  Mommy points at Daddy, who shows me his spoonful of peanut butter.

Now, I must execute this perfectly.

I turn my head slowly, keeping my eyes wide.  I see Daddy holding the peanut butter spoon out to me and I show interest.  Smacking my lips, I say, "num, num."

"Yes!"  Daddy beams.  "Come over here.  Come get your num, num."

First one step, then another.  I balance away from Mommy.  Left foot, right foot.  I make it to Daddy.  I reach for the spoon, but...

"No, no.  You can't have any," Daddy says and pulls the spoon away.

Excuse me?!  I just walked to you!  The plan was I come to you and you give me peanut butter.  What is this, 'you can't have any?'

My face turns red.  I give him my glare and I let my scream wail.  Up the walls, through the house, not an inch is spared from this ear piercing shrill.

"You can't offer it, then take it back!"  Mommy yells with a smack to Daddy's head.

"Fine, fine.  I'm sorry, Rose.  Here is some peanut butter."

There!  Mission accomplished at last.  When acting cute is not enough, this little baby can scream quite diabolically.

Upcoming Log:  Will be Sweet for Meat
Previous Log:  Will Talk for Chocolate


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