Being diabolically delightful

 As Logged By:


Agent Chase


The cabbage and beans pushed the limit.

It’s time to take it easy for a minute.

We may be the Diabolical Drei,

But we’re still babies that smile and cry.


A scary dream shook me awake.

Hold me, Mommy, for goodness sake!

I promise I won’t do anything bad,

Though a toot may escape, just a tad!

 

 

Mommy knows it was me. I see it in her eye.


She squinting that suspicious squint that only a mommy can achieve.


“Chase, your little dog disaster went too far,” she warns in her deepened, don’t-mess-with-me-or-I’ll-make-you-regret-everything voice.


Too far? Certainly not! I declare it, I certainly do, that this diabolical mastermind could have done even worse.


Just to be safe, though I flash Mommy a smile. One I’m sure she will love.


But, Mommy doesn’t buy it. Not for a second. She lifts an eyebrow and turns out the light.


“Goodnight,” she says and leaves me alone in my bed.


What about my goodnight kiss? What about a hug? No songs to send me to sleep? No pretending your lips are stuck to my belly and tickling me by blowing raspberries?  Nothing?


My lower lip trembles. I feel a tear starting to form.


Maybe I did take it too far. I love being diabolical, I love seeking out new tactics for driving my parents mad, but I’m still simply a baby. A slightly devious, but really delightful one at that.


I fall asleep among the sniffles.


And my dreams start with a bang!


A fart bomb that won’t explode?! How horrendous! Chocolate cookies that have lost their flavor?! Ghastly! The puppy taking all of the glory and being crowned most adorable of all?! No!!!!


STOP!


Make it stop!


“WAAAHHHHHHHH!”


Mommy runs to the rescue after hearing my wail. She scoops me up in one big swoop.


“Chase, what is it? Oh, Sweetie, you’re crying. It’s okay, I’ve got you.”


Yes, please hold me. Don’t ever let me go! Not after those horrible dreams. Those nightmares that made me scream. I promise I’ll be good from now on. No more torturously diabolical plots for this little one. No more plotting, no more stink, no more…


PPHHHFFFTHP!


“Chase,” Mommy growls and wrinkles her nose. “Did you seriously just toot on me?”


I may have, just a bit.


Whew it stinks! I’m such a diabolical baby.

 

Upcoming Log:  Diabolically clogging the toilet

Previous Log:  Diabolically stealing my leftovers

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