Food Fight

As Logged By:

Agent West 


There stands Mommy and Daddy

All covered with food,

While I beam real gladly.

I'm such a diabolical dude!


It started with mashed peas

Before throwing some carrots.

What next will I seize

To toss at my parents?


"Okay, West.  Let's see if you'll eat this," Mommy groans.  Her hair is a tangled mess.  Her shirt covered with mushed peas.  Somewhere on her hiney is a stuck-on Cheerio.  And, last but not least, the make-up on her face has completely smeared.

All thanks to me!

Mommy sets the bowl of itty bitty pasta covered in tomato sauce in front of me.  Her hand quivers as she prepares to take a scoop.

The little pasta pieces do look good.  Should I take a bite?  I could sneak just a little between flings and swings.  Ooh, how abominable it would be to give Mommy the idea that I'm done throwing my food.  Should I do it?

Yes, I think I should!

I open my mouth to take a bite of food and Mommy scoops a little pasta with her kiddie spoon.

But Mommy sees my smile and pulls her hand back just in time.  She could tell that I was going to seize the spoon and hurl the pasta back at her.

"Now West.  You have had almost nothing to eat and I know that you are hungry.  Isn't there something you won't throw?"

I almost declare "no," but the squint in Mommy's eye stops me.  She squints with her left eye.  She squints with her right.  What is going on inside Mommy's mind?

Although I've heard Agent Chase say before, "It takes a diabolical mommy to make a diabolical baby," only now do I consider the truth behind her words.

And there it is!

The gleaming smirk, the diabolical beam.  Only, it is not coming from me!

"I think I know what to do,' Mommy laughs most diabolically before putting something in the microwave.

Never fear, dear reader.  I still have a diabolical trick or two up my sleeve.  No matter what she brings back, even if it is chocolate mousse, I will still fling it all over Mommy's face!

"How about some blendered beef stew?  You, Little Man, have never had beef before."

Ooh, that smells good.  I just might have to try this food.

Nah, and I grab the spoon and sling a nice glob right against Mommy's cheek.

Mommy huffs, Mommy puffs.  Have I taken it too far?

"Just one bite..."

Mommy jerks her head to the side with a gasp.  I twist over to look, but nothing is there.  And do you know why?

Because nothing was there!

It was all a trick.  A ruse.  When I turn my head back around, Mommy's at the ready with a spoonful of stew.  Into my mouth she pops the spoon.  But, before I can spit it out, I get a taste of this stew.  It is meaty and rich.  So delectably delicious.

This stew tastes too good to throw.  I must have another bite.  Oh pretty, pretty please!

Upcoming Log:  I've Discovered Chocolate.  Oh, my!
Previous Log:  An Apple a Day Makes the Cuteness Stay


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